The Difficulties We all Face
It's sincerely one of the most difficult points in life when one can not in any way trust their own fart. I've been peeing out of my ass for a day now. Any and all farts are treated like isolated prisoners in a super max waiting for their 30 minutes of time for the outside. "No no no." I say to inmate stanky "You'll only be let out when the time is right. You can try and sneak out but I'm willing to do whatever it takes to keep you confined until further notice you bitch."
Isn't that life. We're all confined to the supermax prison of flatulence. The loud clappers that render you inadequate mid 4 star meal. The silent killer that stinks the whole elevator with absolute death accompanied with the words "I think that old guy did it!" The truly disasterous outspray of the Shart without remorse. Did you know there are more shart related deaths a parsec than there are people beaten to death with actual sharks. Seriously, look it up. And what do we say to the god of death in those moments. "I just shit my pants. Please, end me now."
